whatifiguredout:

I guess this is how the rest of the world feels when Americans wont shut up about the superbowl.

casbaby:

everything i know about eurovision from what i’ve been seeing on my dash:

• 12 points
• alcohol is free
• dracula has hot naked guys friends??
• britain is NOT the star of the show
• you vote for your neighbors or DRAMA HAPPENS
• EVERYBODY DRESSES VERY FLAMBOYANTLY THERE IS GLITTER ON EVERYTHING ITS LIKE SOME REALLY WEIRD DRESS UP PARTY
• HOT GUYS?
• GAY PEOPLE?!
• ??????? I SAW SOME GIRLS DRESSED AS MOOSE
• ALSO SOMETHING ABOUT EYEBROWS

thelesbianpotato:

guess what I’m doing tonight
if you guessed nothing
you’re right

elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey:

joelbyeman:

I feel like people in horror movies live in an alternate universe where there are no horror movies

That explains a lot

shotawars:

shotawars:

some guy just called my number thinking i was a male prostitute, and he started talking to me about how much he could pay me so i pulled up gunshot noises on my computer and started screaming and he panicked and hung up

911 jUST FFUCKING CALLLLED ME IA AMC LAUGHHING SO HARD I TOLD THEM THE SITUEATION AND I’M STULL FUCMKING LAUGHING BECUASE NO W HTE’YRE TRACING THE GUY TO ARREST HIM FOR TRYING TO SOLICITEA ND PAY FOR SEX

I’VE DONE A GOOD

warpedesto:

do you ever just

make a friend and think

I am so glad this friend is mine

zaymmaliks:

SOMETIMES I WANNA BE A WHORE AND DO DRUGS JUST TO SHOW MY MOM HOW MUCH WORSE IT CAN BE THAN JUST LEAVING MY DIRTY SOCKS ON THE FLOOR

whimsicalspecks:

akitron:

buttlarious:

tumblr is boring today better go check tumblr

 #I literally get bored and close tumblr only to reopen tumblr

corrupted-teens:

Do you ever feel people staring at you and you like forget how to walk